Working on My Retirement

I've been busy this past week. I worked 4 1/2 day at Mercy Hospital, on call for 2 departments. Today I worked 4 hours in OB, certain that it would be a short dance.

Wow, was I wrong! When I arrived at 7 AM there was one woman being assessed. That is where the pregnant woman is checked to see if she is indeed in labor. Another was being prepared for a Cesarean section. There were also 6 or 7 in labor rooms; that is where they are admitted and eventually deliver. I started sorting some papers and had quite a spread out mess when a nurse brought me the "pink card" with information on the new baby. Then I make up a chart and do various other things to get the baby officially admitted.

I wasn't done with that baby's admission when the tirage nurse told me the mom they were assessing was staying. There were things to be done in the computer and on paper for her admission to a labor bed. The phones got busy, the nurses gave me things to do, patients called on the intercom, medicines came in the tube system and I had to enter a security code at the income port in order for the tube to drop into our basket, visitors came in abundance, dietary had questions, etc, etc. The mom we had just admitted gave birth. Three more deliveries came right after that.

Between 7:30 and 9:04 we had a total of 5 new babies! I was so happy to see my relief come in at 11:00. I don't think I ever worked so hard at the OB desk before. It was actually fun in a way to be there, but it is so good to be home now. It was one wild Saturday morning.

"You're Not Alone"

Today is the first day of my assignment to myself to do three things daily: read the scriptures, write something, and play the piano and sing. Most of my time so far today has been devoted to these three things.

I became especially interested in an old song by the title of "You're Not Alone," which I used to sing often in days gone by. Knowing the church magazines had published it in 1984, I searched for it at lds.org so I could print myself a clearer copy. It didn't take long to find it. In order to share it now, I'm entering an online path to it written both as a poem and in sheet music. I know there are family and friends who might like to at least look at the song/poem, and giving these directions will show clean copies they might want to print for themselves.

lds.org
Gospel Library
Magazines
New Era
Past issues (to the upper left)
1984
Jan-Feb 1984
You're Not Alone - words and music by Michae McLean

To print the sheet music, click on to view larger. Click to enlarge one page at a time. After printing page one, I had to close it before it would let me then enlarge and print page 2.

Sorry that I again have no pictures to spice up my blog. I have to grab one of my kids to show me how to hook my new camera up to the computer!! I suppose I will have to put that on a to-do list in order to actually get it done!

Gifts and Talents

Today I finally went to my optician's office at North Suburban Eye Specialists in Coon Rapids and had the left lens glued back into the clip-ons that fit my glasses. It's been months since the lens popped out the first time and I picked off the line of tacky glue which had held it in place. I've had to nurse the lens ever since. A few weeks ago, the wind picked it right out of the frame and dumped it at the feet of the woman walking behind me as we entered Walmart. She and I had a good laugh over that one!

As I waited for the optician to do her magic in the back room, I overheard another optician ask his friend if she was going to take boots with on her trip out west next week. She replied she wasn't going to ski this time because last time she went skiing, she fell and couldn't get up. They had a good laugh over that one! Now she looked pretty fit to me, and not all that old. She admitted to not really being too interested in skiing any more anyway. But I thought how if she chose, she could work out and strengthen her legs and ski again.

This evening my visiting teachers came over with a message about reading the scriptures daily. It ought to part of our routine, like eating, sleeping, and brushing our teeth. Well, I'm pretty good at eating and sleeping, and I love to floss and brush. (My dentist and his hygienist are impressed by how well I do!) But I've fallen short when it comes to consistently reading the scriptures. I've consistently done crossword and sudoku puzzles (to keep my aging brain from atrophying) and read other books, though.

I've been given so many gifts and talents. I count the gospel as the greatest gift because it explains the purpose of my being here on earth. I count music and writing as some of my talents because they seem to come naturally and give me such great pleasure. But lately I'm like the lens that keeps popping out and like muscles that haven't been used and don't work as they once did. I'm not staying in the right place, and I'm not staying strong. Every once in a while I told myself I could easily establish a daily routine to keep my gifts and talents fresh. But then I wouldn't make a list--a written commitment-- and slipped back into the easy course of television, puzzles, and books. Well, not from now on!!!

Starting tomorrow, my daily commitment will be to:
* read the scriptures at least 15 minutes a
* play the piano and sing at least one song
* write a poem and/or a journal entry of at least 50 words

These things I will do in the morning, "morning" being defined as prior to noon, before doing anything else, except maybe listening to Fox News as I wake up and get dressed.

As the King of Siam proclaims in Rodgers and Hammerstein's musical, The King and I, "So let it be written. So let it be done."

Good night.

The Fireplace That Isn't

In all of my excitement last month about our new floors, I forgot to include pictures of what is happening to our basement family room. This is stonework done by our new friend, Cyle (pronounced as Kyle, but his dad is Clyde and wanted to spell it with a C, like his own name), who is a stone mason. He and Phil installed the upstairs laminate. Because of water damage last summer, Jerrod DeGolier installed a new ceiling and new laminate flooring in the basement family room. Dan painted the half paneling. We still need to paint the top part of the walls. We don't have a fireplace, but when we bought the house in 1986, this woodburning stove came with it. After a few years, we plugged the stovepipe connection and stored the stove.

But Phil and Cyle revived the stove and built a kind of fireplace for it in the past 2 months. Cyle designed the work for the wall and built a shelf to hold andirons and wood. In front of that, he built a free-standing, up-side-down box for the stove to stand on and covered it with stone to match. Phil connected the pipe and sealed all the joints. Since these pictures, he also repainted the stove black.

One very special feature is that the stove can be disconnected and the box on which it stands removed so that when we sell the house, the new owners will be able to remove the stove if they desire. Yet still, the beautiful stonework will remain. We have had some very comfortable fires. Then with the stove being up off the floor, it is very easy to clean the ashes out. (A serious consideration for us senior citizens!)

In addition, since these pictures, Cyle put matching stonework around the 2 other windows in the basement. Phil painted the stairs, the wall cabinet containing our circuit breakers, and the inside of the window casements a brick red to further draw the room together. We will soon paint the upper walls to match the bricks that fan around the wall opening for the stove pipes. After making curtains for the windows and the storage closet at the bottom of the stairs, we will be almost done working on the basement. The only thing remaining will be the fun decorative stuff.

We are so happy with the work that we have had done on the house! We are happy to recommend Cyle's stonework to anyone. And Phil's work, of course. They are an excellent team.

Another Carol Lynn Pearson Poem

DAY-OLD CHILD

My day-old child lay in my arms.
With my lips against his ear
I whispered strongly, "How I wish --
I wish that you could hear;

"I've a hundred wonderful things to say
(A tiny cough and a nod),
Hurry, hurry, hurry and grow
So I can tell you about God."

My day-old baby's mouth was still
And my words only tickled his ear.
But a kind of light passed through his eyes,
And I saw this thought appear;

"How I wish I had a voice and words;
I've a hundred things to say.
Before I forget I'd tell you of God --
I left Him yesterday."

I received Beginnings in 1971 as a thank-you gift from a friend for singing at her wedding. It was one of her favorite books and immediately became one of mine as well. I had given birth to our two oldest in 1968 and 1970. This poem rang oh so true. I took the book to the hospital with me for the birth of our other four children and read "Day-Old Child" my first nights of holding my day-old babies.

A Continuum

Today Rosie Denny called to ask me if I could help her find a poem. She visits an inactive church sister by phone, and this sister would like to find a specific poem she remembers. Rosie thought I might know the poem or be able to help her find it. Thank goodness, it is a poem I remember from years ago when I was in my child-bearing years.

The poem is "Day Old Child" by Carol Lynn Pearson and I KNOW I have a copy of Beginnings, which contains the poem. Naturally, the problem is that I now need to locate the book. But that should be easy since I know where most of the books I'm keeping are located.

I was hoping to find the poem on one of the internet sites about the author. I didn't. But I did find another fine poem from the same book and I'm copying it here for myself and anyone who might check this blog. Most of the poems are from the perspective of a young mother. Here is the title poem:

Beginnings

Today
You came running
With a small specked egg
Warm in your hand.
You could barely understand,
I know,
As I told you of
Beginnings–
Of egg and bird.

Told, too,
That years ago you began,
Smaller than sight.
And then,
As egg yearns for sky
And seed stretches to tree,
You became–
Like me.

Oh,but there's so much more.
You and I, child,
Have just begun.
Think:
Worlds from now
What might we be?-
We, who are seed
Of Deity.

~ ~ Carol Lynn Pearson


Reading this now as a mother of adult children with children of their own, I have an expanded view of the meaning of the poem and of eternal life. I see the little ones God sent through me no longer as potential adults. They ARE adults. I am so pleased with each one of them, and so thrilled to find out where they going and where they have been. Apron strings are cut, but never heart strings. We are connected in ever-changing ways, yet still have the shared beginnings that bind us forever. We are connected that same way to our heavenly parents. And so it goes on and on. . . .

Life is quite the exciting trip, and we can always find joy in it. Won't it be wonderful to see this continue into the next life and see what we will then become?

When I find "Day Old Child," I will post it as well.

My Days in Court

Last week I was on jury duty. Going in I felt almost honored to be asked to participate in our American system of justice this way. It is an important responsibility. I was happy that after the questioning by the judge and attorneys I was in the group chosen to sit on the jury of a criminal trial. All of us listened to testimony and our instructions, and when it was our time to go into the jury room, we discussed the counts brought up against the defendant and came to a decision.

We gave our judgment, and after the courtroom cleared and we gathered our belongings, the judge interviewed us and told us many things about the defendant that had been withheld from us before and during the trial. The defendant had been on parole, and his attack on his ex-girlfriend had put him back into prison to serve the remainder of that earlier sexual misconduct sentence. We jury members gave a collective deep sigh of disappointment because we had been way too generous in our judgment on his attack of last summer. He had invited his ex-girlfriend for dinner and a movie at his place while their 8-month daughter slept in the back bedroom. He had had custody of the child several days prior. He took his ex by force into a bedroom in his mobile home and attempted to rape her. However, he stopped the attack and let her go.

I'm copying parts of a letter I wrote to the judge the evening after we gave our decision:

Dear Judge,

As you might imagine, most of us jury members for the trial of MP are heartsick over the verdict we returned today in light of what we learned in our interview with you after the trial. I can only imagine MP is happily flabbergasted while RC is totally stupefied. My heart goes out to her.

It seems our confusion came from several sources.

1. We didn’t understand the idea of abandonment under Minnesota law. We believed that when MP stopped the attack, we had to consider that as a conscious choice which would seemingly “erase” the initiation of the attack. Since we couldn’t read his motivation, we looked at the idea of “good faith” too broadly. ANY reason for his letting RC go was a positive for us. We discussed the idea of reasonable doubt pertaining to this point, and to others.
2. We separated reasons for the attack, coming to agree that after RC refused sex, MP became enraged, thus making the attack no longer sexual in nature. Looking back, we were SOOOO wrong. We should have realized it was sexual in nature because he was still attempting penetration. That is a question we should have asked of you.
3. RC had a history with MP, and freely admitted his ___ “only brushed” against her vaginal area. It seemed very possible she didn’t want to bring charges against this former lover and the father of one of her children. She didn’t call 911 until talking with her mother. RC mentioned her mother, friends, and friends’ mothers as having advised her to bring charges against MP. RC admitted she and MP had a quarrelsome relationship; perhaps she felt things would blow over once she distanced herself from him because they had in the past, but was then pressured by others to press charges. When one of the first calls she made was to tell MP to bring the baby to their friends’ house so she could pick her up, it seemed she was confident that he would do what she told him. So while she was terribly threatened during the attack, once he stopped and she was away, she seemed to be handling things well enough.
4. During her testimony, RC could have used stronger words and been more certain of herself in order to be more convincing. It must have been confusing at first to tell her story multiple times, depending on the manner of the questioning by various people. But after 7 months, it seems she should have calmed down enough to be more certain of what happened. She was still qualifying, as if she didn’t really want to get MP in a lot of trouble.
5. There were no pictures of physical damages to RC, not even to the lower leg MP had zipped to the mattress handle. Was it lucky for MP that she didn’t bruise much?
6. I could to on and on, but I won’t. This is already too long for me to hope you might read the whole letter!

These concerns only scratch the surface. As I said, I know most of us are heartsick. It seems so unfair that we didn’t know MP’s history. That could have been the reason his attorney didn’t put up a defense. But we thought of a number of other, less nefarious reasons as well. We simply did not know.

This was one of the hardest situations in which I have ever been involved. I’m so sorry we didn’t return a more JUST verdict. I hated not having background and certain knowledge. We were too gullible and soft in giving MP the benefit of the doubt. We didn’t interpret our instructions well. We all agreed we wanted to rule more strongly against him, but erred in thinking the evidence wasn’t strong enough for us to do so. I am thankful, though, that MP is identified for what he is and that he will serve more prison time. Please consider giving him the maximum sentence for the predatory kidnapping charge.

Thank you for the way you conduct your court. It must be a very hard thing to be a judge. I appreciate the way you handled us jurors.

PS - - . . . and after a couple of hours letting this letter “cure,” I’m still feeling rather shabby for the weak verdict we returned. The bad guy sort of won.
(End of letter to judge)

We didn't even know MP's age until after the trial. He is 27 or 28; RC is 21. Even that might have given us a clue he had a history, rather than leave us to think perhaps these were simply 2 relatively decent people having a temptestuous relationship. MP's sexual misconducts of the past are on his record still, of course. And the one good thing we did was add predatory kidnapping to his wrap sheet so the people who live in his neighborhood have a better idea of how dangerous he can be.

Serving on a jury is indeed a deep responsibility. I'm thankful to have gone through the experience. Until today, my thought has been that I hope never to have to serve again. But I'm coming to see that I learned so much from this that I would be a much better juror if I am ever called in the future.

I'm so thankful for my testimony of the gospel. I know our judgment here is imperfect-- way imperfect. But we did the best we could with what we were shown and instructed during the trial. We did what was asked of us, and MP will serve more time and carry an additional label through his life. I know MP will finally be judged by the Lord in His full knowledge, mercy, and justice. We judged MP too softly, but his final judgment will be ultimately fair. This is my comfort.