Tuesday, June 14, 2011

I really should take some pictures!

My blog is rather plain, but it's mine. If Bob and I were more photogenic, I would include some photos. I should probably go around looking for things that would make good pictures. Hmm.... Or I could just put in a lot of "before" pictures, if you know what I mean. I could go weed the perennial garden and take pictures of how hearty the plants have become. But right now I'm at the computer, planning.

Therefore, I found myself writing to a friend to ask about topstitching the quilt I'm making for Ginger and Gerald's wedding. Since she and I both have concerns about our weight and therefore our health in aging bodies, I gave her an update on that. In the last lines of the email, I found I had finally written a short, four-word statement of my concerns. After writing, "I love my husband and my husband loves me. I am so blessed. All of our children are doing well these days," I finally was able to admit, "It's just the weight!"

Since that's all it is, I can be patient.

Today I had fish, green beans, fresh-cooked spinach, and a roll for dinner. I also had a regular soda and a piece of cherry pie. Earlier I'd had a regular soda and some pepper jack Tornadoes from SA.
And water. Not ideal, but better. So I'm thankful for most of today's food choices.

I wonder what my 3-lb weight loss had to do with how I ate today. I'm sure it had something, but I can be patient.

So I'll concentrate on the upcoming wedding for Ginger and Gerald. I love sewing for happy occasions! I'll prepare piano lessons for grandchildren and Gerald, and consider taking a non-family boy as an additional piano student. (In fact, that one I'll pray about.) I'll work some at the hospital. I'll attend church meetings.

I'll pray more and work harder. And I'll be patient because it's just the weight. It's everything else that has real meaning and brings joy.


Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Birthday

Today was my birthday. Number 65. Wow. Hard to believe. It started out with a call from Mercy surgery, asking me to fill a sick call. YES!!! Vacation is coming up, so we can use the money. Plus, keeping busy keeps focus away from food.

So I had a piece of cold pizza for breakfast after showering. At the hospital, I bought a 20 oz Pepsi. Lunch was good; I had brought bagged salad greens and Asian peanut salad dressing and bought a few vegetables at the salad bar. In the afternoon, I had a 20 oz Cherry Pepsi. For dinner, Bob and I went to Que Viet and had egg rolls and chicken eggs food young with white rice. We drank water. So now I'm quite full.

I know this was not a great day for food intake, but it was better than recent days, and WAYYYYYY better than most days since my A-fib experience last September.

I got called to work for a sick call again tomorrow in surgery. My food goal for the day will be to drink only water. It satisfies and fills the stomach. I am going to take particular notice to see if eliminating sugar cuts down on my headache and general body aches. I wish I had more time so I could make some squash soup to take with in the morning. I have the squash, but I have little energy left. I'm tired now, but if I can't sleep, I can get up and make the soup.

Robin phoned and sent a text today. Justin came over with a card and visited Bob and me for a while. The others sent notes on Facebook. Our kids are the joy of my life. I'm making changes so I can live long enough to enjoy seeing the grandchildren grow up. And I want to finish a lot of quilts!!!

Need sleep. Good night.

Monday, May 30, 2011

Never too late!

I haven't posted for almost a year! I'm so glad that what I wrote last year remains because it gives me a boost. And that is just what I need. I wouldn't have thought I would get a boost from myself, but I have.

I'm turning this blog into notes chronicling my AGAIN newly sustained promises to myself to change my lifestyle. In fact, I finished an 8-week course in St Cloud by David Kroska, MD, about eating whole foods and exercising. I've been feeling pretty weak since September of 2010, when I went to the hospital for treatment of atrial fibrillation. After a few days of observation, hooked up to an IV and a heart monitor, I was discharged, still in A-fib. While in A-fib, I couldn't take more than a few steps without becoming overwhelmingly breathless. I remember taking a short walk around the hospital station meant stopping at least 4 times to breathe. When Bob and I went to Aamodt's apple farm, a fall tradition for us, I could barely walk into their store. By the time I went to the cardiologist a couple of weeks later, I was out of A-fib, but still very weak and running out of breath easily. Yet it was still good to know I was back in normal rhythm.

I'm turning 65 today. Never when we were having children could I imagine myself turning this retirement age! But here I am. Dr Kroska says we can get away with eating poorly for the first 50 years or so, but always, the standard American diet (SAD) will catch up with you after that. Well, I was able to carry around my extra weight easily enough until last September. Now my back aches and I just don't have much endurance. I have to now pause to catch my breath even after getting into the Trailblazer. Such a simple act--getting into the car! And I'm wondering once again if I have finally hit the bottom, so to speak, figuring that if I have, I should push up from that bottom and bounce into a better life.

David Kroska's course taught the whys and hows of a "whole food" diet for the most part. There was some lecture also on exercising. He taught with power point, books, and plenty of handouts. He also included a couple of guests who had turned from the SAD to the whole foods to testify of their changed lives. Weeks 2 through 8 he brought samples of whole foods that either he or his wife cooked at home or brought from an organic store/restaurant. Everything we ate in class was delicious. And while Dr Kroska was a bit haughty or maybe even kind of self-righteous about making these changes, there is no denying that eating beans, legumes, nuts, fruits, and vegetables is what we humans were meant to eat. He did not try to make us all vegans, but explained how little meat is really necessary or useful in the human diet.

I am very thankful to Andrea, my daughter-in-law, for telling me about him and forwarding the information on joining his class. She was at a church meeting where Dr Kroska spoke and was very impressed with his knowledge and enthusiasm. Andrea had already studied a lot about nutrition and has been feeding her family with whole foods for quite a while. She lost 80 pounds quite a few years ago and has kept it off. She is also quite physically active. All the kids and Ryan too are keeping an ideal weight and eating reasonably.

I don't begrudge anyone their success in managing their diet and exercise to take off--or keep off-- excess weight. I was very struck today at the church picnic that I am the only woman in our ward who is truly morbidly obese. I was aware today of how very angry I am with myself over my weight and lack of fitness. The fact is that since I was sick last September, my weight has even increased so that now I am the heaviest I have ever been. And I know it is mostly from lack of exercise. I am now eating better, but I still have a ways to go. I am happy that I know more now, after the course, and that I do succeed in making much better choices in food.

It is now my prayer that I will continue to get stronger control in my choices of food and activity. I can see it will also help to get my house in better order. But that is a subject to think about more another day. I plan to use this blog to document the changes for the better as I make them. I'm not inviting anyone to read this, but I'll leave it open for now.

Good night.